I'm feeling, angsty, annoyed, pissed, furstrated. wow, great array of moods.

I hate. abhor. detest. people. who. make. my. friends. upset.

especially when it is for a perfectly ridiculous reason to get upset over, then make my friend upset over you being upset. upset is a mild word to use for tears and heartaches. If I could, I would go up to you, and give you a good shaking. because you, deserve it. only she can put up with you.

I dont care, if you are sec4. and think that there is no point to go for cca. or think that favouritism is the way to go. what is the point of cca? you dared to say this.

I could ask you back, what was the point of making you president then? what have you done for EL? because the fact is, you have done nothing.

what have become of our dreams? nothing. nothing. hopes and dreams were luxuries we couldnt afford right from the start. I'll fight to put people who can do it up there. one year is enough. you wont spin or play me. I'm game for you, now.

we were once the greatest level el has seen in years. turns out, we're just like them afterall.

I'm so tired of fighting, because there seems to be no point in it at all. I dont know what I am fighting for, and that makes me tired. I am so tired. so so so tired. I'm tired of it all.

and you. why call me to question what I have done as captain? why me? of all people. I'm no longer the junior you once knew. I thought the betrayal was complete when I found out what you did last year. but the surprise continues to spring. from the juniors, from others, and this.

I stood by you and defended you against my own level. I was there for you, always. I never ever left your side even though time and again you stabbed me in the back. I dismissed it as your character, that you didnt mean it. I took your excuses and justified it to myself, time and again. is this your legacy? to spring rude surprises on me when I least expect it?

you once declared me your favourite junior. you called me your friend. you know how that hurt, when you called today? you were never there for me, yet you called and scolded me. you dont even know what happened.

I can hold my head up high and look you in the eye. I have done nothing but my best for debate. I didnt let oal get in my way, I didnt let studies get in my way. I never shunned my duty. I loved debate, the act of it.

I can look el in the eye and said, I did what I could. despite it all. I did it. and I wouldnt shed a tear when I look back. I wont regret my four years.

anger is a good cover for everything. but at the end of the day, we're all just wounded bears fighting to get out of the cages we have.